“Y’all Aren’t Cute”: Mean Girls that Hold Nothing Back
The other day when at a friend’s birthday party I had a most interesting encounter with a young woman whom I know only indirectly. While sitting and taking a picture with another friend towards the end of the party, this fellow student walked up behind the photographer and said, “Y’all aren’t cute”. Clearly thinking that it would be impossible for anyone that had never actually met us to say something so absolutely unnecessary and crude, we replied, “thank you!” To this, we were shocked to hear “No, I said y’all AREN’T cute!” and the young woman then exited the party.
Now, having survived going to an all girls high school for two years where there was nothing “better” to do than talk about each other and to another high school where forgetting to smile at someone in the hallways could quickly result to being “defriended” on the latest web phenomenon, Facebook, hours later, I thought that I had seen the cattiness at its worst; this reached an all time low.
Mean girls are notorious for being “backstabbing bitches” that will smile in your face, compliment you on your outfit, and then turn around and discuss its hideousness the second you leave, but it is very rare that these actual thoughts are delivered face to face if no event provokes a fight in which “all hell lets loose” and nothing is held back. Needless to say, I was dumbfounded and could do nothing other than sit openmouthed! What are you to make of someone who says such a comment with the intention of being hurtful? Are they simply mean, or very insecure and in need of pity and prayer? This act was especially malicious because my friend and I did not know the young woman to an extent further than seeing her in the school cafeteria. As new students at the school, one would hope that a graduating student, having been through four years at a renowned institution would be supportive of their fellow students, but seeing that such ideal behavior is obviously rare, it would be nice if the commenting student had by now learned something about dignity and respect and the fact that such comments surpass the concept of common courtesy with flying colors.
A week later the same student confronted me in the cafeteria and asked my name to verify who I was, as if she hadn’t figured this out by now. The conversation resulted in her explaining to me that she “wasn’t saying what [she] said was wrong (previously she had commented “I call a spade a spade; you all simply weren’t cute”), but she just “wanted the drama to stop”. She also explained to me that I was completely out of line when I then told her that perhaps in the future she might consider not making similar comments to people because it simply isn’t normal to have the gall and nerve to walk up to someone you don’t know and comment on their appearance. Regardless, this is simply an example that despite whatever formal education or upbringing on has, some people remain utterly ignorant and heartless when it comes to such demanding, hard parts of life such as social interaction. And so, the reign of the mean, or simply malicious, girl continues. On a lighter note, since other students have heard of the matter and its audacity, the phrase “Hey, you AREN’T cute” has evolved into a widespread joke across campus. :)